I have a fascination with cemeteries… is it because of the work I do now? I’m not sure actually. Evidently, I have a fascination with things in the fog as well. I am jealous of people that get amazing fog shots where it has layers. I was excited when we reached that point in the year where fog was fairly regular in the mornings, but of course, it was always on a work day so that wasn’t helping.
Finally, the forecast called for heavy fog on a Saturday. So, when I got home from work on Friday, I pulled the cameras out and informed my husband that I was going to visit one of the cemeteries in our town the next morning.
He looked at me like I had 3 heads and says, “You. You are going to a cemetery in the dark… by yourself…. With the kind of work you do?”
I, of course, very confidently said, “Yes”.
I guess I really threw them because even my son looked kind of puzzled and offered to go with me. He’s in his early 20’s and doesn’t rise before noon unless it’s for money or I presume, a fire. I assured them I would be fine and got ready for the bed.
The next morning came, and I had set an alarm to get ahead of the sunrise. My husband got up with me and started getting ready. He said, “You really think I’m letting you do this alone?” Ha, Ha! I really was convinced I could do it, but he was probably right.
The thing that made it exciting for me? We were literally fighting time. Sunrise was coming and we found ourselves in the place between pitch black and the sun starting to come up, allowing the light to start coming through and beginning to give you shadows and depth.
We got there early and got some nice nighttime shots of the church, then headed in. He went one way, I went the other. We moved quickly, silently…. Respecting where we were but eyes constantly moving to find an interesting angle or structure. The fog wasn’t the kind I wanted. It didn’t have layers, but it did create a bit of a spooky backdrop.
This was one of the first shots I took. The fleur-de-lis fence was such a beautiful representation of the area and culture. And Mary was so iconic and with the lights trained on her, it gave the feeling of a beacon in the night.
Shooting digital is very different from the old days when it was all film. You shot and waited to find out what you really got. In a way it forced you to be more methodical and more aware of your settings to get exactly what you wanted. But at times, you got a happy accident. In the digital world, at least for me, you tend to check after you shoot. You can adjust and retake shots. You can let things go if they aren’t perfect. It reminds me of our old TV days… the saying of “I’ll fix it in post”. Now it’s, “I can fix that in photoshop”.
But has that mentality spoiled me? Just shoot and fix it later…. That day, with the speed we were shooting, I wasn’t checking shots. I went by instinct. I knew the light was coming and basically, I would get what I got and there was an excitement to not really knowing the outcome of the day.
But… That goes against my character in almost every way. I am someone who wants to know. I want to know how to prepare. Do I need to zig or zag? Is there an action I need to take? Can I prevent mistakes, conflicts, or worse?
But that day, I just let it happen. I was present in the moment. We got home tired and hungry from being up so early. We were damp from the moisture that hung in the air and when I looked down, my boots and jeans were covered in wet grass from the cemetery. It made me smile. It was evidence of a fun adventure. I love days like that, where my heart is full, where I’ve put forth the effort to capture something beautiful. Something that may speak to someone else and tell a story they need to hear, or in this case see.
It also struck me, how different this feeling was and how often I am the exact opposite in other parts of my life. Is that because I’m doing things that are out of alignment? Is it because I’m trying to control things too much?
What if I just allowed myself to be present? To react to what’s in front of me versus controlling the situation or allowing the desire to “know” control me.
It struck me that morning — I couldn’t predict, retake, or fix it later. I had to trust my instincts, be present, and allow whatever unfolded to be enough.
Reflection Prompts
- When was the last time you let yourself be fully present without worrying about the outcome?
- Where in your life are you trying to “fix it in post” instead of allowing it to unfold?
- How does it feel to trust instinct instead of controlling every detail?
Practices & Exercises
1. Fog Walk — Take a short walk with no agenda. Instead of planning, just notice what you see, hear, and feel. Let your attention wander instinctively.
2. The Unfinished Page — Write for 5 minutes without editing or crossing out. Let it be messy, raw, and imperfect.
3. Presence Pause — Next time you feel the urge to plan or control, stop and ask: “What’s right in front of me right now?”
Closing Thought
The fog didn’t give me the shot I thought I wanted, but it gave me something better — a reminder that presence is enough.
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